A simple friend has never seen you cry.

A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.


A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names.

A real friend has their phone numbers in her address book.


A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.

A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.


A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.

A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.


A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.

A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.


A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.

A real friend could blackmail you with it.


A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.

A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.


A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.

A real friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.


A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.

A real friend expects to always be there for you!